Dreams

I've been on work-related travel for the past four weeks.  Between the airports, long drives, sleepless nights and tons of work I realized I stopped dreaming.

Somewhere over the past 2-3 years I stopped wanting to impact the world.....change myself for the better.....love again.....live again......

I wish I knew the reason why this happened, but at least I realized that I was walking around unfulfilled.   It would be wonderful to know why I have no motivation to do anything.  Why I continue to stay stagnant.  Why I stopped living.

But I doubt I ever will.  I guess the first step was to admit that I stopped dreaming.

I have no idea what the next step is.  I will attempt to motivate myself and get back to dreaming....living....loving.  All of those things start with me.

Internally, I'm still battling some issues of guilt, low self esteem, feelings of failure, etc.

I have to accept myself and my past for what it is.  There are things I can change about myself, but NOTHING I can do about the past.

The way I see it is I have about two months to get a plan together and execute it.  I could just wait until 2015, but I want to dream again.